2ndJanuary2012

All I would like right now is to know I can wake up without thinking about Alex first thing in the morning. I wish that I could get past the whole day without thinking about him even once. But that will not happen, not for a very long time. Today has been a good day for me; I woke up at 10 as this year I am trying to wake up at a decent time, watched the last few episodes of skins series 3, showered and sorted my face out. Just as I was about to walk my lovely border collie Webster, my friend Laura from down the road came over. We went for a walk around the Green and was back within an hour, we talked about what has happened since we last saw each other [just before Christmas]. She spent new years eve with another friend, I think there's a good possibility that if she came to mine instead, nothing would have happened between Chris and me. I don't have any hard feelings towards her at all for her not being over mine, just would have rather she was. I do love Laura so very much, she truly feels like a little sister to me. I'm back to college tomorrow after the holiday break, I am dreading the early morning but feel I may cope better as am going trying to get to sleep for before 12. I tend to lay awake in bed for an hour most nights, continuously thinking about everything which is going on in my life, and of course weird crap too. College should be okay tomorrow, as long as I get focused on my work and I am not reminded about Chris or Alex too much. I feel this month will go too slowly and will be very difficult. I'm rambling on a little tonight, I don't have too many thoughts right now, still am confused with what I'm going to do with my life to set it back on track and get to where I want to be. Today my love is going towards Laura <3